Why I blog

When I started blogging, it was because my daughter, Lydia, had been born at 28 weeks.  Looking back, blogging helped me connect with so many people and with myself.  I put into words so many things that I couldn't share with people face to face.  

After 3 years, it's finally time to leave the preemie trauma behind.  The old blog really helped me heal.  The further away from the NNICU we got, the less pain, less guilt, less worry there seemed to be.  Yet I didn't feel like I was moving on.  Instead, I was revisiting a really painful time of our life and revisiting old wounds.  If you're dealing with preemie parenting issues and would like to look at the blog, you can find it by clicking here.  I won't be posting there much at all and I've decided to turn the blog into a family memory book. 

Lydia is extraordinary.  I'm sure all parents believe it to be true of their children.  Lydia's extraordinary because she's alive.  I know there are many out there who have experienced losing a child.  Just the fear of losing mine was all-consuming.  And then the thought of losing my child to the effects of prematurity gave me many sleepless nights.  
Now, it's not all about her developmental delays or what doctor she's going to see.  It's about the silly things she does and the many 3 year old traits she's displaying.  It's wonderful because there was a time when these conversations were for 'other' parents.  Yet when I talk about the little things - the everyday mundane pre-schooler things - it's with absolute mindfulness and conviction that we, that SHE has fought hard to be here.  I don't take it for granted.
There's a Shakespeare quote that really resonates with me, "Though she be but little, she is fierce."

We love her.  Sharing who I am, how I change and how I Iive my life will give her roots and give her wings.  And that's why I blog.